a few people I know are struggling with family situations… often it is with mom or dad, or even a spouse who is not well and needs care, but don’t necessarily want it…

I remember when my mom was dying and in Princess Elizabeth Hospital… I watched a dozen people move into and out of her four bed ward while she was there… it seemed if they didn’t have family who came regularly to see them, that they would soon be drugged and basically sleep through whatever time they had left… I was in the amazing position of not working so I could be with her every day… it was a special time… we had the opportunity to say all the things we felt and grew close over those last months…

she was dying of esophageal cancer, which spread to her brain… the radiation treatments she had before being transferred from Grace Hospital slowed the brain cancer and kept her basically pain free, until the end… she had smoked all her life, but stopped for a few months once she went into hospital… but while she was in the palliative care ward she started to smoke again – in those days, there was a room that you could smoke in, not like today… many thought she was nuts, but it was really the only thing she had control over… everything else was decided by someone else: when she would eat, sleep, take meds, get dressed, washed… basically everything… and really, she was dying anyway, what difference would a few cigarettes make…

I was blessed with the time and space to be able to be with her every day and it was truly a gift to walk that final journey with her… as difficult as it was, I wouldn’t give up one moment…

she came home for Christmas that final time, and we had a great day…  she wanted to stay here to die, but I didn’t think that the girls could handle it at the time, so took her back to the hospital the day after Christmas…  she died two days later…  I climbed into her bed and held her as she took her last breath…

walking the halls of St. Boniface…

George was with me, as he always was in times of trauma and difficulty… my best friend and beloved…

I hope that I will be able to hear when my kids are telling me I need to make changes in my life, and I hope that they will be able to hear me…

all of this reminds me again how important every moment we have is…  whether we are experiencing the highs of life, or the lows…  they each need to be savoured…  life is a gift and it is important to enjoy every second…